Sorry, it’s a long one…here is your chance to just keep on scrolling.
Being a band wife for as long as I have, you learn and understand the inner workings of a band. You kinda come along with the package and although you are on the outside, if you are lucky you are welcomed in as part of the band. I have been this lucky with every band that has marched in and out of our house. As you observe you find out that there is something special about being part of this tight nit group, and you learn what it means to watch the band become brothers, and what that means in your life as the wife. One thing I know is that, whether they are currently in a band together or a band of the past, I have a special group of people who, if called upon, will be at my door in an instant.
We have shared so many things with all the band mates Steven has had over the past 30 years. From a Christian band to many many years of Classic Rock, Hard Rock, Heavy Metal and even a short stint in Country music. We have been through amazing things. We have been there for each other when family members have had hard times or even passed away. We have witnessed addictions, recovery, weddings, break-ups, births of children and grandchildren, graduations, vacations, illness and understanding of disability or mental illness and even have gotten mad at each other and made up…just about any situation that you can think of, we have experienced it with band mates. For me and Steven, one thing we cannot say we have experienced is losing a fellow band mate…until now.
This…this loss is one I cannot explain. Robbie has been a constant in our lives for as long as I can remember. Personally, I have known him since our time together at Lincoln Junior High. Steven has known him just about as long. Robbie has watched our children be born and grow up, and we are lucky to have watched Hannah do the same. There isn’t a time I can remember when Robbie didn’t just show up and hang out. I cannot count the times he has slept on our couch and eaten our food and played our guitars. It is hard to wrap my brain around not coming home to him jamming out in an unexpected, but always welcome jam session. Robbie always made the effort to keep in touch, he called Steven at least once a week or more just to say “hi”. He was that friend.
Robbie didn’t just love music, Robbie was music. He could talk about music for hours, he knew everything about any band you brought up. He absorbed every note and was an expert at guitar solos, even if he didn’t think so. I could never fathom what it was like inside his head…the music never ceased. He never stopped practicing, he always had a guitar in his hands and was always playing it, writing his own music or just going over and over a lick he wanted to get right.
More than his love for music, which was bigger than you can imagine, Robbie loved his daughter. Robbie lost his dad while he was still considerably young, and he missed his dad like mad. An irony that has not been lost in this situation. He was over the moon when he found out he was going to be a father, and he did everything to be the best father he could. We watched Hannah grow up into a beautiful talented woman, and Robbie was there every step. Was he perfect? No, but he was perfectly imperfect as a father. There is nothing Robbie would not and did not do for Hannah and now his grandson.
Robbie was very proud of his family and talked about them often. His sisters Mattie and June and his brother Claude were always in a conversation or two. I haven’t seen them or his mom in quite a while, but she always made us feel welcome in her home and always fed us no matter what.
I am trying to process this and I know we will get through it together, as band mates and band wives, but there will always be a void…a silence that only Robbie could fill.
Robbie, we will forever miss you and your music. No one will ever be able to be the Robbie you were to us.
Monday May 28, 2018 at 9:07 pm